Dear broken-hearted, fall in love with you first

         I Just read a post from a fellow blogger where she stipulates that Loneliness isn’t the absence of emotions but actually the absence of direction. Well for someone that hates taking every statement hook,line and sinker, I pondered on this paradigm till one evening a friend and I were discussing and I asked her how she intended spending her valentine’s day.I teased her on how she should carefully select what she intends to buy for her lover, the delicacy of the bars of chocolate she should select, the class of the perfumes she needed to buy, and most importantly the tone and sincerity of her voice when she tells him I LOVE YOU. Unknown to me,I was stirring pain and anguish deep within her and had no idea till she broke into tears. As she spoke to me, I could feel she felt completely and totally dejected and not good enough, she felt as if her very essence for her existence was boarded around her ten year relationship with her boyfriend who at the turn of the new year informed her he was GETTING MARRIED. 

      It is the season of love yet again couples strive hard to remind themselves how they feel about each other, a season where guys like me wonder why we still don’t have a girlfriend(S)  , the almost perfect time to propose with a diamond or titanium ring and hope she says yes, a day where you could just ask that girl or guy across the street or at work to the movies and hopes he/she doesn’t turn you down, and sadly for a vast majority like my lonely, heartbroken and emotionally hurt friend, a day where you just ponder of what could have been or why me?

       One of the worst things in life asides losing a loved one is watching that loved one love someone else, trust me it hurts like a >>>I KNOW…stumbling on their happy or wedding pictures anytime you open your facebook page, scrolling only to see them express their love on twitter and of course if you aren’t strong enough to delete them from your yahoo messenger or BBM, watch him /her change their Display Picture every second while you dwell and lavish in your so called self pity and loneliness. 

But the reason you are lonely isn’t because you don’t have someone loving you no more neither is it because the one you love is loving someone else nor because you feel there is something wrong with you spiritually or physically, you just simply lack direction.

       Think about it, where were you going before you met them? What were you dreams and ambitions? What were those things that you could do that maybe their presence stopped you from doing? If you slumped and died at the moment of intensive thinking and emotional torture do you think they would care? 

You being this lonely only means and spells out that you never ever cherished yourself and quite frankly you should be thanking God they left.

     

There is a popular saying that goes somehow like this

 you must first learn to love yourself before you can be loved or even love

Love is the reason for the season and no one deserves to steal your happiness away no matter what and if you  feel the need for company take a friend, a colleague, a relation, a sibling out or better still take me out(@maestroeni) …… :D.
LOVE YA,
maestroeni(dangel eyez contributor. twitter: @maestroeni)